Niceties

You turn to me and ask whether it hurts to be so nice? Is it difficult to be this person? I smile. I am not making an effort to be so. This is me. I do what comes to me naturally without thinking twice. Why is it that this nature seems daunting, odd, fearful and unaccustomed to many, including you?

You are not convinced. You still tell me it is not possible to be this way. I tell you I have not been any other way. I do not know if you will ever agree with me.

We continue walking and you lean against me. I sense your taut shoulders pressing against my ribs. You seem bothered. I put my arms around you as you lean against my nape. A smile escapes your lips while you find your own cozy corner. I kiss your forehead. the cold skin makes my lips quiver, while the warmth permeates you. I look up at the CITGO sign looming over Kenmore square for an instant, only to reacquaint myself with the curious brown eyes looking at me inquisitively. Its going to be a long night.

We walk across Brookline ave and watch the revelers make way from Fenway. The crowd intimidate you for a bit, but the myriads of happy faces and red caps have an aura of their own. The energy that permeates the biting chill of the night makes everyone put their best step forward. You take my hand in yours and drift aimlessly. I wonder what you are wondering. You look at me and smile. The same smile that caught my eye, the one that makes your eyes light up and curves the corners of your mouth. That same smile, following which I cannot comprehend what could happen next.

I know we have our tribulations, doubts, insecurities and faith (or the lack of it). I know that during this winding course, things will not end up being what it seemed. We still carry on, being ourselves, believing in the things we always did and said, say and do. Thats what makes cold dreary nights not so gloomy. Our world conforms to us eventually.

I bend down to kiss you as you tug my lapels, arching your neck and closing your eyes. It will take me a while to get back to planet Earth. But I softly land, my feet firmly in the ground.